he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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