please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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