Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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