Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
