She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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