So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
