Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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