nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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