More tranny stories later!
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
We just shotgunned beers for America
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
