it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
