Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize