The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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