it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
