we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
