Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
