that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
