I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
