It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
