that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
