I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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