the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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