I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
