Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
