Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
