For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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