I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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