You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
