SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize