there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
