I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
