And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
