oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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