god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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