just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Randomize
