if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
