Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize