sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
