Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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