no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We have started to decorate penises.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
