I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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