I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Randomize
