I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
