so explain again why im purple
no
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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