his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize