I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
