U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
