I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize