I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
home. puking in laundry basket.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
