I accidentally burped into my bong.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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