Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
